Map of the Heart

At a photo storage site, (within the modern marvels of the world wide web) called ‘picture trail’ there is an added attraction called ‘photo flicks’. There are twenty-seven different types to be exact, with names such as: slow slide, peel mirror, and bobble heads, to name a few. The ‘photo flick’ that caught my attention, actually mesmerized me is called ‘rotating glass’.

It is a box, in the shape of a rectangle - after the photos are chosen and take up their residence within, the box starts to turn, showing the pictures in a translucent way. The box turns slowly in what appears nothingness. There would be no way to touch the photos inside - one can only watch.

I tried many pieces of art, I tried various sizes of the box and I tried several backgrounds, none of which satisfied me. If the truth be told I decided against this particular ‘flick’.

Something bothered my sensibilities about this, a feeling of being uncomfortable occurred.

After reading the segments on mapping the heart I remembered the ‘photo flick’ and I could see my heart within it’s glass dimensional walls, spinning slowly, going absolutely nowhere.

I came to believe I couldn’t build a strong wall around my heart, I chose glass and saved bricks to build a wall around my physical self.

In my heart are many broken trails, or heart breaks that needed protection. Sometimes protection is not what is needed. Feelings, thoughts, fears can become jumbled and confused. The wrong type of protection can keep one from living and loving. If it goes on too long , it will break and shatter, especially the heart.

I will not fool myself - this housed heart will take some time to take apart. I can take  down its sides first, and go from there, piece by piece. It will take endurance mixed with hardwork, patience along with faith and a new found ability to trust this process called healing.

~ by Patricia Hine Stewart on December 15, 2006.